Breakups suck...let's just get that out in the open right now. They are awkward, painful, and often leave you wondering what exactly went wrong. We (ladies) usually spend way too much time replaying and over-analyzing every little detail in our heads...kinda crazy really! But for the past few weeks a lot of people (mostly men actually) have been paying close attention to a big time breakup happening right here in Texas.
That's right, I'm talking about Texas A&M's divorce from the Big 12. Now I know, I'm an Aggie, so my stance is probably biased right? Give me a chance to explain...you just might be surprised!
Last summer the internet blew up with rumors of Mizzou bolting for the Big 10. People were speculating left and right...who would go where, would the Big 12 survive...you name it and there is probably an article about it somewhere. When all was said and done, Nebraska and Colorado went their separate ways, leaving behind a 10 team conference "held together" by the promise of more money for everyone and better tv deals. And all was right in the world again...or was it?
Fast forward a year later and here we are again...on the brink of another team leaving a conference that was once regarded as one of the best in the country. But this time it's my team.
I remember sitting at my desk a few weeks ago when seemingly out of nowhere my twitter feed went crazy with rumors that A&M was once again negotiating with the SEC. Huh? Didn't we just do this? Talk about deja vu.
Now here's where it gets ugly...the reason for the breakup.
I have read A LOT of articles lately and there are a lot of opinions floating around about what the final straw was for A&M. Some will say it's the Longhorn Network, others chalk it up to jealousy...maybe it's a combination of both, or maybe there's more to it than the burnt orange and white down the road. It is possible that no one will ever own up to the real reason(s) for the split...it's always easier to deflect the blame onto someone else anyway. It's not you it's me, right? Right.
Here's what I know...I was raised to be a Longhorn by parents, aunts, uncles, and cousins that all proudly hailed from the school down in Austin. And as a kid I loved it. I also didn't know much else. Sure I knew there was a school of Horned Frogs in my town...and some Bears down the road...but nothing even held a candle to the Longhorns. That was until I realized that maybe it wasn't for me. Back then it had nothing to do with sports either, it was more about finding a place where I fit the best. And for me that place was in College Station...at a school I should've snubbed my nose at based on the name alone. Lucky for me I had parents who wanted the best for their kids, no matter what. It wasn't until I was fully immersed in the Aggie culture and traditions that I truly became a college sports fan. Not that I had much to cheer for, we were pretty mediocre (bad) at football during my 5 years at A&M. But I yelled anyway. And I stood to support my team. All the while trying to respect the achievements of our rivals in Austin (with the exception of games played around Thanksgiving every year).
For the most part I think I was pretty fair...I was ok with being in a conference that sent a team to the national championship game every couple of years. At least that's what I told myself anyway. And for a while that logic was ok...but then the playing field changed.
It wasn't until Nebraska and Colorado left that I realized the problems we were facing. Or maybe I just chose to ignore them as long as I could. Sure there were 2 schools (yes I said 2) that got most of the attention in our conference, but isn't that because they were winning? And isn't that how it should be? That's what I thought anyway. But it seems over the past few years things have started to change. Teams have been thrust into the spotlight for a number of reasons that don't involve winning games (see North Carolina and Miami). There are also the teams that choose to have the spotlight shine on them. And I think this is where the bigger problem comes into play.
We all want to be the best (whether we openly admit it or not). Constantly having the spotlight shine on someone else gets old and sometimes we do things, smart or otherwise, to bring it back to us. What this has meant lately is instead of trying to maintain strong traditions and build upon the relationships at your disposal, you decide to look out for #1. This doesn't just apply to Texas (and their network) either. Nebraska and Colorado were looking out for themselves when they decided to leave last year...they both wanted a bigger piece of the spotlight. And the same can be said for A&M this year as well. We feel like it's our time to shine...take our talents to a place where we feel they'll be more appreciated. Note I didn't say more prominent.
So who's really to blame? That's what we're all looking for isn't it? Someone to blame it on. Something that makes us feel better about things not working out the way we hoped they would. Most won't admit that this divorce is going to be painful, but it is, especially if losing our rivalry with the Longhorns is a side effect. And like any couple that splits, we'll both move on with our lives. But it doesn't mean that occasionally we won't look back longingly and wonder what could've been if things were different.
With that said I am proud to be an Aggie and wholeheartedly support the decisions being made. I am both excited and scared for the road ahead, it will be an uphill battle and I hope that we can step up to the plate. All I have left to say is I can't wait for the road trips!!
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
Saturday, August 20, 2011
But I still haven't found what I'm looking for...
Most of you who know me probably know that my favorite guilty pleasure is a little reality tv franchise known as The Bachelor (and also The Bachelorette and Bachelor Pad). For some reason, even though I know it usually doesn't work out in the end, I just can't stop watching. I confess that I did miss the first couple of seasons (and possibly one or two others along the way...cough cough Byron), but for the most part I am a loyal viewer.
Now if you know me well then you probably also know that I am a bit of a skeptic when it comes to fairytale endings in real life. Some may call that being bitter or cynical, but I prefer to think of it as being a realist. Hear me out before you navigate away...even a skeptic can be proven wrong every now and again.
So on Monday night I was actually quite annoyed with myself because I forgot to set up my DVR to record the current season of Bachelor Pad (little did I know the best part was yet to come). I flipped over just in time to see Chris Harrison announce that 2 girls would be eliminated this week and the ensuing strategy/drama as a result of this shocking announcement. At the rose ceremony we all knew it would come down to either Ella or Jackie getting the boot (yes I am actually blogging about this show)...and luckily Ella made a last minute alliance that kept her safe for one more week. Alas, it was Jackie who had to leave. And for those of you who haven't been watching this season Jackie had been getting to know sweet Ames while in the house of crazy. What happened after she learned she would be leaving shocked me (in a good way) and was possibly the best/sweetest/most romantic thing I've ever seen on any season of The Bachelor franchise. That's saying a lot after 15 seasons of the Bachelor, 7 seasons of The Bachelorette and 1 season of Bachelor Pad. The clip below speaks for itself...I know it's a little long, but watch and I promise you'll know what I'm talking about.
When I first saw Ames on the most recent season of The Bachelorette, he seemed like a very smart but very vanilla guy. And then as he started getting more camera time I grew to love his charm and clever wit, he really was quite funny. So I was a bit surprised when I learned he was going to be on Bachelor Pad...because let's be honest, nice people don't really stand much of a chance on that show. And as I watched the scene above unfold on Monday night, it made me realize that maybe there are knights in shining armor still out there. I've watched it a couple of times since then as well (is that weird?) and I can barely hold back the tears.
Tears. Over a silly reality tv show. But it isn't the show that got to me, it's the fact that deep down we all (women) want what we claim not to need. A man who loves us and is willing to fight, or in this case give up a shot at $250k, for us. And to be honest I don't think there's anything wrong with that.
So thanks for the reminder Ames...even this skeptic was convinced (if only for a moment) that there is someone out there willing to fight for me. Until then I'll be patiently waiting for my red pants wearing knight in shining armor.
"I have run, I have crawled, I have scaled these city walls, these city walls, only to be with you...but I still haven't found what I'm looking for..." U2
Now if you know me well then you probably also know that I am a bit of a skeptic when it comes to fairytale endings in real life. Some may call that being bitter or cynical, but I prefer to think of it as being a realist. Hear me out before you navigate away...even a skeptic can be proven wrong every now and again.
So on Monday night I was actually quite annoyed with myself because I forgot to set up my DVR to record the current season of Bachelor Pad (little did I know the best part was yet to come). I flipped over just in time to see Chris Harrison announce that 2 girls would be eliminated this week and the ensuing strategy/drama as a result of this shocking announcement. At the rose ceremony we all knew it would come down to either Ella or Jackie getting the boot (yes I am actually blogging about this show)...and luckily Ella made a last minute alliance that kept her safe for one more week. Alas, it was Jackie who had to leave. And for those of you who haven't been watching this season Jackie had been getting to know sweet Ames while in the house of crazy. What happened after she learned she would be leaving shocked me (in a good way) and was possibly the best/sweetest/most romantic thing I've ever seen on any season of The Bachelor franchise. That's saying a lot after 15 seasons of the Bachelor, 7 seasons of The Bachelorette and 1 season of Bachelor Pad. The clip below speaks for itself...I know it's a little long, but watch and I promise you'll know what I'm talking about.
When I first saw Ames on the most recent season of The Bachelorette, he seemed like a very smart but very vanilla guy. And then as he started getting more camera time I grew to love his charm and clever wit, he really was quite funny. So I was a bit surprised when I learned he was going to be on Bachelor Pad...because let's be honest, nice people don't really stand much of a chance on that show. And as I watched the scene above unfold on Monday night, it made me realize that maybe there are knights in shining armor still out there. I've watched it a couple of times since then as well (is that weird?) and I can barely hold back the tears.
Tears. Over a silly reality tv show. But it isn't the show that got to me, it's the fact that deep down we all (women) want what we claim not to need. A man who loves us and is willing to fight, or in this case give up a shot at $250k, for us. And to be honest I don't think there's anything wrong with that.
So thanks for the reminder Ames...even this skeptic was convinced (if only for a moment) that there is someone out there willing to fight for me. Until then I'll be patiently waiting for my red pants wearing knight in shining armor.
"I have run, I have crawled, I have scaled these city walls, these city walls, only to be with you...but I still haven't found what I'm looking for..." U2
Saturday, July 23, 2011
This modern love, is not enough...
2 posts in one week...really? Who am I? It is quite possible that due to intense summer heat I may be a little crazier than usual...or maybe I'm just stir crazy!
A few evenings over the past couple of weeks I have spent some time looking for new and interesting blogs to read online. I stumbled upon some that have literally brought me to tears and others that have given me a lot to think about. I tend to find what people have to say very interesting (I've always loved to read). It can be so very personal and yet most are willing to share with anyone who cares to read it.
I have become especially fond of reading tidbits from one of my favorite authors, Don Miller. Over the past 6 years or so I have read most, if not all, of his published books...even read some of them a couple of times. But it wasn't until recently that I discovered his blog/website. I assumed he, like most authors, had a website where you could find info on his next speaking engagement or list of books he's written. What I found was something so much more direct and personal. And I really appreciate that because I've always found his books to be very relatable, at least to me and my life anyway.
As I was scrolling through some of his previous posts I came across one about a list his fiancee had once put together of all the things she was looking for in a man. So of course I had to read it. People always talk about these magical lists, but before that I'm not sure I'd ever seen anyone's personal list. And as much as I like to think I keep a running list in my head, I had never actually taken the time to put it on paper. But after reading through his post and her list I felt like it was something I really needed to do. Sounds pretty silly right?
A few evenings over the past couple of weeks I have spent some time looking for new and interesting blogs to read online. I stumbled upon some that have literally brought me to tears and others that have given me a lot to think about. I tend to find what people have to say very interesting (I've always loved to read). It can be so very personal and yet most are willing to share with anyone who cares to read it.
I have become especially fond of reading tidbits from one of my favorite authors, Don Miller. Over the past 6 years or so I have read most, if not all, of his published books...even read some of them a couple of times. But it wasn't until recently that I discovered his blog/website. I assumed he, like most authors, had a website where you could find info on his next speaking engagement or list of books he's written. What I found was something so much more direct and personal. And I really appreciate that because I've always found his books to be very relatable, at least to me and my life anyway.
As I was scrolling through some of his previous posts I came across one about a list his fiancee had once put together of all the things she was looking for in a man. So of course I had to read it. People always talk about these magical lists, but before that I'm not sure I'd ever seen anyone's personal list. And as much as I like to think I keep a running list in my head, I had never actually taken the time to put it on paper. But after reading through his post and her list I felt like it was something I really needed to do. Sounds pretty silly right?
The more I thought about it, the more I realized that there's nothing wrong with having a list of qualities you think a man should possess. I hope that a man would also find it ok to have this same type of list for a woman. To put it in Don Miller's words, "What is great about creating a list like this is it gives a single person a filter through which to weed out candidates that don’t fit." Amen. Needless to say I started a list. Largely based off what his fiancee had written for herself...I found that we had a lot of similarities in what we were both looking for, and it was a great place to start. Scary as it is, I am putting it out there for everyone to see. Maybe it will help people understand why I have never been one to simply date someone for the sake of going on dates. Some call it picky, I call it taking my time. Without further ado...
The List:
I want someone who…
- loves God with his whole heart
- loves his family (and mine)
- wants to talk to me every day, 30 times a day if that’s what he/I need
- can’t wait to see me again
- is always thinking about me
- surprises me, in good ways from the little to the big
- plans dates for me
- follows through on what he says he’s going to do
- is consistent in his actions and behavior
- doesn’t disappear
- reassures me of his feelings for me with his actions and words
- wants the whole world to know how he feels about me, isn’t afraid to show it or say it
- puts me first, after God
- is not afraid of my sensitivities, scars and brokenness but wants to be a part of healing them
- always makes time for me no matter what else is going on
- pursues me
- isn’t afraid to challenge me
- makes me laugh and can find joy in the simple things
Simple enough right? Sure...28 years in and still waiting for God to reveal that person to me. But I know he will be worth every second of the wait! And with that...I leave you for the night. I hope that you know you deserve someone that meets all of the criteria on your list!
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
Let's see how far we've come...
I really meant to post this a few weeks ago, but things have been a little chaotic lately and well...at least I'm doing it now!
June 25th was a big (and busy) Saturday for me. It started off with a 1st birthday party celebrating the cutest baby in the whole world...not that I'm biased at all!
I mean how can you not love that face? The party was full of family and friends celebrating a little girl that is more loved than she yet knows. Watching her grow and being a part of her story has given me such joy over the past year.
After the party it was time for lunch (yes the party was at 10 am). Because it was a special weekend, high school reunion and all, one of our friends was nice enough to organize a lunch with a few of us that have grown up together and one very special guest.
12 1/2 years ago we lost a sweet friend. And so as we gathered together to celebrate 10 years full of college, careers, and family, it seemed only right to include someone whose son should have been there with us, and certainly was in spirit. It was truly great to see everyone "all grown up". Though it didn't really feel like much time had passed at all. Funny how we all come back together and things seem to pick up right where they left off. One of the things I love about these people.
Even though it was only a brief time together, it was so nice to catch up and laugh and share stories from our lives.
After lunch I rushed home to shower, do my hair, get dressed and head over to the Kinson casa for a little pre-reunion get together. I had organized some time for a group of us to hang out and catch up before the big shin-dig. And I am so glad we made it happen, it was one of the many highlights of the day.
The reunion itself was a lot more fun than I expected it to be. Perhaps I had somewhat low expectations going in, or maybe I had just been so busy earlier in the day that I didn't have time to over-think it all. Either way, I had a great time! For the most part people seemed to have moved past the high school gossipy ways...which I was very thankful for...and all in all it was lovely to hang out with people I hadn't seen in far too long.
Overall a pretty fantastic day. Definitely worth a bruised knee and lost voice the next day. I can't wait to see what God has in store for me and my family and friends over the next 10 years...one day at a time!
June 25th was a big (and busy) Saturday for me. It started off with a 1st birthday party celebrating the cutest baby in the whole world...not that I'm biased at all!
I mean how can you not love that face? The party was full of family and friends celebrating a little girl that is more loved than she yet knows. Watching her grow and being a part of her story has given me such joy over the past year.
After the party it was time for lunch (yes the party was at 10 am). Because it was a special weekend, high school reunion and all, one of our friends was nice enough to organize a lunch with a few of us that have grown up together and one very special guest.
12 1/2 years ago we lost a sweet friend. And so as we gathered together to celebrate 10 years full of college, careers, and family, it seemed only right to include someone whose son should have been there with us, and certainly was in spirit. It was truly great to see everyone "all grown up". Though it didn't really feel like much time had passed at all. Funny how we all come back together and things seem to pick up right where they left off. One of the things I love about these people.
Even though it was only a brief time together, it was so nice to catch up and laugh and share stories from our lives.
After lunch I rushed home to shower, do my hair, get dressed and head over to the Kinson casa for a little pre-reunion get together. I had organized some time for a group of us to hang out and catch up before the big shin-dig. And I am so glad we made it happen, it was one of the many highlights of the day.
The reunion itself was a lot more fun than I expected it to be. Perhaps I had somewhat low expectations going in, or maybe I had just been so busy earlier in the day that I didn't have time to over-think it all. Either way, I had a great time! For the most part people seemed to have moved past the high school gossipy ways...which I was very thankful for...and all in all it was lovely to hang out with people I hadn't seen in far too long.
Overall a pretty fantastic day. Definitely worth a bruised knee and lost voice the next day. I can't wait to see what God has in store for me and my family and friends over the next 10 years...one day at a time!
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
Life's a dance you learn as you go...
How has it already been 4 months since I moved here? Where has the time gone? Sometimes I think I get so caught up in the whirlwind of life I forget to stop and take a moment to appreciate everything I have been blessed with lately.
A lot has happened over the past 3 months since I last blogged...mostly with my job (don't worry I haven't moved or changed companies again). The job I was hired to do has kind of taken on a whole different form than what it was when I first started. Which may have always been a part of the plan mind you, but I'm pretty certain it won't stop changing anytime soon either! Whether that's good or bad is yet to be seen. I have gotten to experience some pretty cool things since I've been there...going to the NCAA Men's National Championship basketball game in Houston being the biggest so far...and I am looking forward to football season starting up so I can hopefully go to games at some of our properties! For once I feel like I am doing something that really plays to my strengths...working with numbers, people, and in a small, family-like environment (oh yeah the whole college sports thing doesn't hurt either). But there have been some tough moments too...and I'm sure more of those to come...all part of having a lot of responsibilities on your plate I guess. It isn't always easy being the same age as (or younger than) a lot of the people you work with and having to be the "boss" sometimes too. I am thankful that I am a person who handles change and chaos somewhat well though, because things have been so crazy the entire 4 months I've been at my job that I don't know how I would've survived otherwise. Maybe moving all over the place and changing jobs a couple of times isn't such a bad thing after all! :)
As far as everything else goes...things have been fairly calm lately. I spend a lot of my weekends with the fam or hanging out with friends (here or there) and trying to survive the already scorching Texas summer heat.
The biggest thing coming up in the next few weeks is my 10 year high school reunion. Scary right? I still can't believe it's been that long already! It really seems like just yesterday I was walking through the AHHS halls, hanging out in the west parking lot, and trying to find my way through the teenage years. Makes college seem pretty far gone as well. I am excited to see some people that I grew up with and haven't had the chance to run into or catch up with over the past few years...but I think I am more interested to see who actually comes (since I know a quite few people don't live around here anymore)! I'm sure it will be fun reminiscing over things we think are long forgotten...maybe I should bust out the yearbooks for old times sake. Just kidding. I have no idea where those even are these days! I guess I'll have to report back after the big shin dig and let you know how it went. Though having it at Joe T's guarantees at least the drinks will be good!
Boy wise (something I usually don't talk about on here)...things always seem to become more complicated the older we get. Especially because a lot of us are really committed to working hard at our jobs...no matter the amount of overtime or traveling required...and that can sometimes cause us to put our relationships on hold. Not the easiest thing to do, but I think you just kind of get used to it after a while. And even though I try to live with a "life's too short" mentality, it doesn't always translate into every aspect of my life. I am trying to go with the flow and let the bigger plan God has for my life guide me in the right direction, which is definitely not easy for a stubborn/independent person who likes to plan things!
So I guess that's me in a nutshell right now. Well I'm not literally in a nutshell, but you get the idea!
A lot has happened over the past 3 months since I last blogged...mostly with my job (don't worry I haven't moved or changed companies again). The job I was hired to do has kind of taken on a whole different form than what it was when I first started. Which may have always been a part of the plan mind you, but I'm pretty certain it won't stop changing anytime soon either! Whether that's good or bad is yet to be seen. I have gotten to experience some pretty cool things since I've been there...going to the NCAA Men's National Championship basketball game in Houston being the biggest so far...and I am looking forward to football season starting up so I can hopefully go to games at some of our properties! For once I feel like I am doing something that really plays to my strengths...working with numbers, people, and in a small, family-like environment (oh yeah the whole college sports thing doesn't hurt either). But there have been some tough moments too...and I'm sure more of those to come...all part of having a lot of responsibilities on your plate I guess. It isn't always easy being the same age as (or younger than) a lot of the people you work with and having to be the "boss" sometimes too. I am thankful that I am a person who handles change and chaos somewhat well though, because things have been so crazy the entire 4 months I've been at my job that I don't know how I would've survived otherwise. Maybe moving all over the place and changing jobs a couple of times isn't such a bad thing after all! :)
As far as everything else goes...things have been fairly calm lately. I spend a lot of my weekends with the fam or hanging out with friends (here or there) and trying to survive the already scorching Texas summer heat.
The biggest thing coming up in the next few weeks is my 10 year high school reunion. Scary right? I still can't believe it's been that long already! It really seems like just yesterday I was walking through the AHHS halls, hanging out in the west parking lot, and trying to find my way through the teenage years. Makes college seem pretty far gone as well. I am excited to see some people that I grew up with and haven't had the chance to run into or catch up with over the past few years...but I think I am more interested to see who actually comes (since I know a quite few people don't live around here anymore)! I'm sure it will be fun reminiscing over things we think are long forgotten...maybe I should bust out the yearbooks for old times sake. Just kidding. I have no idea where those even are these days! I guess I'll have to report back after the big shin dig and let you know how it went. Though having it at Joe T's guarantees at least the drinks will be good!
Boy wise (something I usually don't talk about on here)...things always seem to become more complicated the older we get. Especially because a lot of us are really committed to working hard at our jobs...no matter the amount of overtime or traveling required...and that can sometimes cause us to put our relationships on hold. Not the easiest thing to do, but I think you just kind of get used to it after a while. And even though I try to live with a "life's too short" mentality, it doesn't always translate into every aspect of my life. I am trying to go with the flow and let the bigger plan God has for my life guide me in the right direction, which is definitely not easy for a stubborn/independent person who likes to plan things!
So I guess that's me in a nutshell right now. Well I'm not literally in a nutshell, but you get the idea!
"Life's a dance you learn as you go, sometimes you lead, sometimes you follow, don't worry about what you don't know, life's a dance you learn as you go..."
Saturday, March 19, 2011
Another time, another town, another everything...
I've been meaning to update the blog for a few weeks now, but as you can probably imagine I've been a little busy! Trying to get settled in at both work and the new apartment has taken up a considerable amount of my time since arriving back in Dallas.
It's kind of like deja vu being back...though obviously things are quite different this time around. I still live in the same part of town that I did before, but am much less interested in the uptown scene these days and wasn't nearly as concerned with living in the most happening or fanciest apartment complex. This time it was all about what worked for me and Ella and was convenient enough to get to work. And even though its taken quite a bit of work (from both me and the maintenance guys) to get it into the kind of shape I wanted...it is really starting to look like home! Of course there are still boxes to unpack and things to be hung...in time it will all get done. It's only been 5 weeks after all!
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared to move back here. I was always the person who quickly corrected people when they asked if I lived in Dallas...bragging about living in Austin or just simply explaining that Dallas and Fort Worth are 2 very different places. And a lot of people were surprised that I would want to move back to Dallas after trying to be anywhere but here the past few years. To be honest if the drive to work was manageable from Fort Worth I would live there...but there's no way I want to sit in the car for over an hour each way everyday.
All in all it really hasn't been so bad thus far. Granted I am older (and presumably wiser) now...and I have no interest in being part of the "Dallas" crowd....but I think coming into the move with different expectations has helped a lot too. Knowing that I would probably spend a lot of my free time over in Fort Worth with the fam and friends didn't hurt either. That's not to say the first couple of weeks here weren't challenging as I tried to adjust...it was all a little overwhelming without any kind of transition time in between the move and starting the new job...but I think I handled it the best I could and finally feel like I am settling in to a routine.
So do I regret my decision to change jobs and cities? Absolutely not. I feel like I am exactly where I need to be right now. Does that mean everything is perfect? No...but it never will be and I don't expect it to either. What I do know is that every second I get to spend with my family, and sweet little Ellery in particular, is what makes all of the adjustments and moving worthwhile. And that, to me, is priceless.
"In a way, I need a change from this burnout scene, another time, another town, another everything, but it's always back to you...stumble out in the night from the pouring rain, made the block, sat and thought there's more I need, it's always back to you...how many times can I break til I shatter, over the line, can't define what I'm after, I always turn the car around...give me a break let me make my own pattern, all that it takes is some time but I'm shattered, I always turn the car around..." OAR
It's kind of like deja vu being back...though obviously things are quite different this time around. I still live in the same part of town that I did before, but am much less interested in the uptown scene these days and wasn't nearly as concerned with living in the most happening or fanciest apartment complex. This time it was all about what worked for me and Ella and was convenient enough to get to work. And even though its taken quite a bit of work (from both me and the maintenance guys) to get it into the kind of shape I wanted...it is really starting to look like home! Of course there are still boxes to unpack and things to be hung...in time it will all get done. It's only been 5 weeks after all!
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared to move back here. I was always the person who quickly corrected people when they asked if I lived in Dallas...bragging about living in Austin or just simply explaining that Dallas and Fort Worth are 2 very different places. And a lot of people were surprised that I would want to move back to Dallas after trying to be anywhere but here the past few years. To be honest if the drive to work was manageable from Fort Worth I would live there...but there's no way I want to sit in the car for over an hour each way everyday.
All in all it really hasn't been so bad thus far. Granted I am older (and presumably wiser) now...and I have no interest in being part of the "Dallas" crowd....but I think coming into the move with different expectations has helped a lot too. Knowing that I would probably spend a lot of my free time over in Fort Worth with the fam and friends didn't hurt either. That's not to say the first couple of weeks here weren't challenging as I tried to adjust...it was all a little overwhelming without any kind of transition time in between the move and starting the new job...but I think I handled it the best I could and finally feel like I am settling in to a routine.
So do I regret my decision to change jobs and cities? Absolutely not. I feel like I am exactly where I need to be right now. Does that mean everything is perfect? No...but it never will be and I don't expect it to either. What I do know is that every second I get to spend with my family, and sweet little Ellery in particular, is what makes all of the adjustments and moving worthwhile. And that, to me, is priceless.
Saturday, January 22, 2011
Some other beginnings end...
It's funny really...the places life takes us. One of my least favorite questions to be asked in an interview, or in any situation for that matter, is,"where do you see yourself in five years?" Because I can tell you that my answer five years ago would be so far off the mark from where I am today. Now I know the purpose of the question isn't to get me to predict the future or anything like that...more of a where would I like to be and what would I like to be doing sort of thing. And I get that I guess. But I really think life is too short to try to plan it so far in advance...and this coming from a person who loves to plan! So it's always something I struggle to answer...do I simply make up a career path I could see myself possibly following or am I honest and say that I don't really want to know what the future holds?
Two years ago I would have never predicted that I would be unemployed and eventually headed back to Texas. And one year ago I never thought I would find myself in the place I'm in now...packing up and moving, yet again, this time back to the Big D (Dallas, not Denver). Crazy right? Maybe my nickname should be the nomad or something. But what's life without a little adventure and change of scenery?
I have to say that the decision to leave Austin after such a short amount of time here was really difficult. I have made some incredible friends, worked with some fabulous people, and won't be able to replace Wednesday trivia nights even if I tried. But I was given an opportunity that I felt I just couldn't pass up at this point in my life. And it may seem like a crazy big risk to be taking right now...uprooting my life, moving back to a city I voluntarily left three years ago, and taking a job in a field where I have absolutely no experience...but it just feels right. I prayed and prayed about what to do and where to go...and I was really conflicted for a few days...all it really came down to was following my heart. Not such an easy thing to do sometimes...especially when you're the one usually making the logical decisions and following your head over your heart.
So here I am...sitting at home blogging when I should probably be packing...or at least organizing to pack...on the cusp of a new beginning down another path. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't excited for this new adventure, but also a little sad to be leaving Austin (and the wonderful people here) behind. But like Denver, I know I can always come back to visit this place I once called home.
Maybe 2011 is the year of new adventures...only time will tell! So for now I'm going to let the future unfold one day at a time...and sit back and enjoy the ride!
Two years ago I would have never predicted that I would be unemployed and eventually headed back to Texas. And one year ago I never thought I would find myself in the place I'm in now...packing up and moving, yet again, this time back to the Big D (Dallas, not Denver). Crazy right? Maybe my nickname should be the nomad or something. But what's life without a little adventure and change of scenery?
I have to say that the decision to leave Austin after such a short amount of time here was really difficult. I have made some incredible friends, worked with some fabulous people, and won't be able to replace Wednesday trivia nights even if I tried. But I was given an opportunity that I felt I just couldn't pass up at this point in my life. And it may seem like a crazy big risk to be taking right now...uprooting my life, moving back to a city I voluntarily left three years ago, and taking a job in a field where I have absolutely no experience...but it just feels right. I prayed and prayed about what to do and where to go...and I was really conflicted for a few days...all it really came down to was following my heart. Not such an easy thing to do sometimes...especially when you're the one usually making the logical decisions and following your head over your heart.
So here I am...sitting at home blogging when I should probably be packing...or at least organizing to pack...on the cusp of a new beginning down another path. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't excited for this new adventure, but also a little sad to be leaving Austin (and the wonderful people here) behind. But like Denver, I know I can always come back to visit this place I once called home.
Maybe 2011 is the year of new adventures...only time will tell! So for now I'm going to let the future unfold one day at a time...and sit back and enjoy the ride!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)